Amintindu-mi de anii de liceu, am vrut, acum c\u00e2teva zile, s\u0103-i recuperez, re\u00eenviindu-i, sub forma unei poezii.<\/p>\n
Atunci, \u00een \u00eendep\u0103rtata epoc\u0103 adolescentin\u0103, visam s\u0103 fiu poet. \u015ei nu orice fel de poet, ci unul chiar de limb\u0103 englez\u0103. \u015ei, \u00eencerc\u00e2nd s\u0103-mi for\u0163ez visul \u00een realitate, abordam o min\u0103 (imberb\u0103) de geniu, \u00een spatele c\u0103reia fermentam, zi \u015fi noapte, versuri pe care, apoi, le turnam, pe manuscrise deja inten\u0163ionat p\u0103tate de cerneal\u0103, \u00een poezii ale marii mele poezii personale. \u015ei tot jocul era extrem de serios \u015fi de fascinant \u00een seriozitatea lui naiv\u0103. Iar rezultatul? Poet n-am ajuns, fire\u015fte, \u00eens\u0103, totu\u015fi, toate acele exerci\u0163ii de versifica\u0163ie, al c\u0103ror prizonier am fost tot liceul, m-au ajutat, ori\u015fic\u00e2t, s\u0103 ajung s\u0103 cunosc, ni\u0163el mai bine ca al\u0163ii, limba pe care, genial \u015fi imberb, c\u0103utam s-o subjug \u00een poezii ale marii mele poezii personale.<\/p>\n
Acum, dup\u0103 at\u00e2ta amar de vreme scurs\u0103, epoca mea adolescentin\u0103 s-a clasicizat, iar to\u0163i anii mei de liceu au ajuns, \u00een fine, la muzeu.<\/p>\n
\u00cen ultima vreme, probabil ajung\u00e2ndu-m\u0103 din urm\u0103 nostalgia (c\u0103reia \u00eei ordonasem s\u0103 nu se ia dup\u0103 mine dup\u0103 ce-am \u00eenceput s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eendep\u0103rtez de adolescen\u0163a mea epocal\u0103), am vrut s\u0103 re\u00eenviez, recuper\u00e2nd-o, \u00eentreaga gra\u0163ie, genial\u0103 \u015fi imberb\u0103, a visului meu de odinioar\u0103 \u00een poezii ale marii mele poezii personale. \u015ei, dac\u0103 nu a\u015f fi reu\u015fit at\u00e2t de amplu, cel pu\u0163in s\u0103 fi reu\u015fit sub forma unei \u2013 singure \u2013 poezii.<\/p>\n
A\u015fa c\u0103, sco\u0163\u00e2nd din amintire \u00eentreg ritualul clasicizat \u015fi ajuns, \u00een fine, la muzeu, am ales un stilou care s\u0103 alunece f\u0103r\u0103 efort pe h\u00e2rtie, am deschis un caiet mai vechi \u015fi, deci, deja prefabricat \u00een manuscris, \u015fi, l\u0103s\u00e2ndu-mi mintea \u00een voie s\u0103 zburde, am \u00eenceput, timid, a zg\u00e2ria alba pagin\u0103 cu semnele melancolice ale poeziei marii mele poezii personale.<\/p>\n
Dar, alas<\/em> (cum ar fi zis englezul des\u0103v\u00e2r\u015fit din mine) sau h\u00e9las<\/em> (cum ar fi exclamat francezul \u00een formare \u00een mine), nu multe au reu\u015fit s\u0103 se \u00eenchege sub ascu\u0163i\u015ful inoxidabil al peni\u0163ei mele\u2026<\/p>\n Dimpotriv\u0103, dup\u0103 numai c\u00e2teva versuri, \u015fi ele amenin\u0163ate cu dispari\u0163ia sub infama linie albastr\u0103, transversal\u0103 \u015fi manuscris\u0103, \u00een care \u00eencercam s\u0103-mi dau seama dac\u0103 prefer, \u00eentr-o asemenea eventualitate trist\u0103, o moarte \u00een detrimentul altei mor\u0163i, g\u00e2ndul mi s-a \u00eempotmolit incapabil s\u0103 aleag\u0103 \u00eentre mor\u0163ile pe care mi le imaginam a fi \u00een stare, \u015fi una, \u015fi alta, s\u0103 m\u0103 ia \u015fi s\u0103 m\u0103 duc\u0103 \u00een locurile lor respective.<\/p>\n Nu zic c\u0103 n-am mai \u00eencercat un pic s\u0103 for\u0163ez visul \u00een realitatea mea prezent\u0103, \u00eens\u0103 degeaba\u2026 Poezia s-a \u00eenc\u0103p\u0103\u0163\u00e2nat s\u0103 r\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103 al\u0103turi de celelalte poezii ale marii mele poezii personale.<\/p>\n \u015ei, totu\u015fi, oric\u00e2t de trist a\u015f fi, chiar n-am de ce. \u00cen c\u0103ut\u0103rile mele tanatice, c\u0103rora am \u00eencercat s\u0103 le dau o c\u0103ut\u0103tur\u0103 poetic\u0103, p\u00e2n\u0103 la urm\u0103 tot am reu\u015fit s\u0103 m\u0103 aleg cu ceva. E adev\u0103rat c\u0103 nu cu foarte mult, dar, \u00een schimb, cu ceva totalmente pre\u0163ios. De\u015fi n-am putut s\u0103 m\u0103 hot\u0103r\u0103sc asupra niciuneia dintre mor\u0163ile despre care am crezut a mi se potrivi, am avut \u00een mine for\u0163a s\u0103-mi dau seama c\u0103 trebuie s\u0103 le refuz pe am\u00e2ndou\u0103. \u00cen plus, le-am spus c\u0103 nu o dau pe niciuna dintre ele pe moartea mea adev\u0103rat\u0103, c\u0103reia nu-i voi ceda niciuna dintre mor\u0163ile mele \u00eenchipuite. \u015ei, chiar dac\u0103 n-am fost prea clar \u015fi e probabil \u015fi s\u0103 m\u0103 fi contrazis, le-am zis pe toate cu ajutorul unui singur vers, care a avut amabilitatea s\u0103-mi suporte nostalgia temporar\u0103 \u015fi trec\u0103toarea trecere prin fostul meu eu genial \u015fi imberb.<\/p>\n Iar el suna a\u015fa: I give no death of mine my giving in to death<\/em>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Amintindu-mi de anii de liceu, am vrut, acum c\u00e2teva zile, s\u0103-i recuperez, re\u00eenviindu-i, sub forma unei poezii.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[295],"tags":[301,196],"class_list":["post-1103","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-jurnal-eidotomic","tag-jurnal-eidotomic","tag-patrick-calinescu"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1103","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1103"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1103\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1106,"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1103\/revisions\/1106"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1103"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1103"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jurnaleidotomic.egophobia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1103"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}